Who I Am Hates Who I've Been,...

Wait, no,... who I am hates who I am. Who am I? I am a shy girl who works in a library with no confidence, I constantly crave physical contact whether it be a hug or holding hands, I run on that stupid treadmill and walk every day and still can't seem to loose any weight, I do things I don't want to do so everyone will get along and be happy, I give my heart to all the wrong guys, I lack the social skills to have friends or meet new people and every other Friday I dress in uncomfortable clothes and head out to a club where I awkwardly attempt to dance and fumble my way through conversations with guys because my friends tell me that I have a chance. On top of that all I will be 24 in a month and I have not accomplished ANYTHING. I'm done. I'm done trying to be someone I'm not, done trying to change myself in the hopes of obtaining new friends and possibly a new boyfriend. I'm going to be me. I'm going to dress in my jeans and high tops when I go to the club, I'm going to talk to people if I want and avoid those that I feel need to be avoided, I'm not going to be pushed into going places and doing things that I don't want to do anymore and damnit if I want to dance with the cute guy at the bar I'm going to dance with him. I'm sick of regretting the actions that I did or didn't take. I'm me. I'm a 1988 delta oldsmobile driver, a lover of Ben and Jerry's phish food ice cream, a master of the old school NES nintendo system, a geek who plays Dungeons and Dragons on Friday nights while drinking blue mountain dew, a fan of the Rocky Horror Picture Show and Star Wars lover, someone who's constantly searching the sky in hopes of finding Doctor Who, a curvy person who's not perfect in any way shape or form, a jeans wearing puddle jumping converse high top loving tomboy bookworm. Deal with it. My friends say that I can't find a date because of the person that I am, I say I can't find a date because I'm trying too hard to be someone I'm not. Maybe I come off as desperate or unapproachable when I follow their advice so here's my plan, I'll be me and do my own thing and someday someone will like that and it will all work out. I know this was more of a boring rant than anything but I had to get it out of my system. Goodnight! Katie